Type 2’s Personality Pearl
My grain of sand as a type 2 is heart, worth and exaggeration.
What this means is that I’m driven by my heart. my emotional need.
This might be unconscious to me, but I feel strongly connected to my heart.
What do we mean by Enneagram Type 2 being a worth type?
What might not be known to me is that my emotional need is to validate my self-worth.
And for this reason, I might exaggerate qualities in myself in order to appear in a way that helps me to be seen.
I want to be seen in a way that validates my worth. That makes me feel needed and loved and appreciated.
I am therefore trying to be helpful.
And my helpfulness can be driven by a need for feeling worthy.
And if my sense of worth is low, I might exaggerate qualities about myself in order for you to see me as helpful.
I believe that when you see me as helpful, I’m going to know my worth.
As I grow as a type 2 my worth becomes known to me instead of something that I case.
I no longer need to exaggerate qualities and my emotional needs become more clearly met by my own wholeness.
But in a lower expression I am going to try to be helpful, in order to feel worthy.
Enneagram Type 2 Key Words
As a type 2 on the Enneagram I am trying to be nice.
I’m putting a lot of effort into being nice.
I’m even going to choose specific words that are kind words. That are helpful and nice words.
I expect that people should be doing the same, that we should be nurturing each other in the way that I nurture.
I nurture our connection.
I nurture either the fact that you find me attractive or that you find me to be kind and loving.
I nurture our friendship.
I might be nurturing in a parental way. Or I could nurturing our attraction to each other.
It’s important for you to see me in a way that I know I am a giving person.
So, I tend to give a lot and I’m not so great at receiving.
That is until I actually know my wholeness and worth, then I can learn to receive but it’s not easy for me.
- I am helpful. I can even help to the point where it becomes smothering. Especially if I have a lower sense of self-esteem.
- I am a people pleaser, whether I am conscious of this or not. At my essence I strive to be unselfish.
- I can be possessive because I really value connections and relationships above all else.
- I can also be interfering, because my attention is on you rather than on me.
- I’m sacrificing my needs for yours after all.
- I make an excellent host because I’m always aware of what other people need and I’m trying to anticipate those needs and fulfil them, even before they are declared or announced.
Love is a very important word for me.
I love to be loved.
You might not know this about me, but I am actually proud.
I am proud to be your ideal friend, or partner or lover, work colleague or leader.
I want to be the hero for you.
I can be sentimental.
But mostly I’m sentimental about what I have done for you.
I’ll tell you I don’t need thanks, but the truth is I do.
And I can get resentful if I’m not appreciated.
If you look at my Enneagram Type 2 cartoon, you will notice that I have a smiling face.
I’m going to show you how I’m okay even if I’m not.
I might even exaggerate my okayness because I want to be your ideal someone.
I’m going to ask you how you are rather than tell you how I really am.
At my lowest expressions, I’m going to give you my apple even if I am hungry.
At my highest expression, I’ll make sure I’ve eaten as well.
I have my heart drawn on me, because feelings connections, relationships are that important to me.
Enneagram Type 2’s Lowest Expression
At my stress point when I am at my lowest, I tend to take on some of the characteristics of type 8 on the Enneagram.
Type 8 on the Enneagram is actually when I’ve given and given and given and feel unappreciated.
And my resentment can become anger.
I might be controlling with kindness.
I’m controlling in an unconscious way and I’m bossing with love because I want you to notice me. And I want you to appreciate me.
And when my self-worth gets triggered I can become very angry, because after all, I have given so much, and I’ve sacrificed so much, and I feel resentful that I am not appreciated.
That’s when I go to the worse characteristics of type 8.
Type 2’s Highest Expression
When I’m at my best I take on the best characteristics of type 4.
This is a very difficult access point for me because I am so focused on you.
And in order to access the best of Ennegram type 4 and to take the polarity of my opposite of 4 on board, I have to focus on me.
I have to move from a “you, you, you” song to a “me, me, me” song.
Which is very, very difficult for me because it triggers my low sense of self-worth.
But if I do this I learn to notice my own feelings, my own needs, my own talents, my own skills and I start to be able to truly look after myself.
I don’t feel guilty about receiving anymore. And I start to develop an emotional vocabulary that describes my honest feelings.
Because when I am in a low function, I can’t express my own feelings.
Whereas when I touch into 4 I start being able to say: “You know, I’m really sad” or perhaps “I’m exhausted.” Instead of “I’m fine.”
I can ask for help when I access type 4 and I can do so without resentment if people don’t help me the way I always help them.
When I operate at my highest I embody unconditional love, love that is clean; without attachment because I discover self-love.
And in my self-love I am able to give even more because I receive and because I look after me I am able to really share from my heart.
That is type 2.